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Recipe for Fixing a Broken Heart June 15, 2008

Posted by ash in Uncategorized.
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There are many recipes for easing a broken heart. Tired of crying myself to sleep, I tried one this weekend.

Ingredients

  1. 1 pack of salt & vinegar chips
  2. 1 tub of Ben&Jerrys ice cream in any flavor you like. This time, I tried Chunky Monkey.
  3. Girlfriends (2 in 1 group and 1 other)
  4. Old episodes of SATC
  5. Sushi and Sashimi
  6. Microphones
  7. Honey Lemon drink
  8. Clothes of all kinds
  9. Pretty accessories

It is best to split the use of ingredients over a period of 2 days. On Sat, I combined (3), (5), (6) and (7).

  • Arrange 2-1 group of girlfriends with microphones.
  • Simmer them and yourself in KTV room for 4 hours, complete with honey and lemon for extra nourishment.
  • After girlfriends and yourself turn into a nice color with euphoria, remove from KTV room.
  • Next, place girlfriends and yourself in a pretty Japanese restaurant.
  • Arrange a huge platter of sushi and sashimi to go with them and you

This should pre-occupy you for 1 day and cause the heartache to subside a little.

For the next part of the recipe, use all remaining ingredients. This should be prepared late in the night for added result.

  • Open Ben and Jerrys ice cream, use it straight from the tub.
  • While doing so, heat SATC old episodes in an oven called TV
  • Add best girlfriend next to you and saute yourselves with the spice and anecdotes (oh so true! and close to your heart) from SATC
  • Introduce hot tea if necessary
  • When all these have been done, place yourself in an air-con room and keep cold for the next 8 hours. This will prevent you from thinking about him.

The remaining part of the recipe should be left to the 2nd day, this will prevent sadness from spoiling the recipe. Use ingredients (8) and (9)

  • Garnish yourself and best girlfriend in all available clothes and accessories
  • Top with compliments to each other

This recipe will not cure a broken heart, as it has been proven by myself…but it will help to ease it over the weekend.

Ingredient 1 is for the aftermath of the recipe. When all the satisfaction from the recipe has finished, add salt and vinegar chips for an extended period of enjoyment.

When all fails and the truth comes crashing down, remember break up rule #2:

Burn / Delete all photos of him looking sexy and you looking happy.

And like Charlotte, I have rehearsed a few lines which I intend to say or text the next time he calls (if he ever does). Let’s hope that these lines get to come out from my mouth.

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